


silence

by orphan_account



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Aftermath, Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Regret, Self-Doubt, i love near i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-31 08:13:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20789831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: mello was drunk and angry. near was close by.





	silence

**Author's Note:**

> a (very) short one shot i wrote before my dentist appointment

* * *

mello regrets it after it's done. when his head is clear and his bones start to ache, the weight of the situation crushes him. he lifts a shameful hand and rubs his temple. millions of thoughts run through his mind. should he apologize? would his pride even let him? should he leave? every action he makes adds to his doubt even more. it's times like this when he hates himself the most. mello doesn't know much about anything anymore, but he does know that he's afraid.

he's afraid to look at near and see the scale of the damage he's done, but he looks anyway. near is lying on the floor a few feet away from him, shaking every second or so. he's not facing him, so he doesn't know what kind of expression he's making, but he thinks he hears a sniffle or two. near's clothes are disheveled, unkept and stained. his bare back is still in view, baggy pants well past and rumpled just below his knees. seeing it makes mello's heart drum with guilt and anxiety.

he shouldn't have drank so much, in fact he had already forgotten why he was drinking in the first place. the night starts to replay in his mind. it started with him getting angry, but every night seems to start that way for him.

always comparing himself to near took more of a toll on him than he cared to admit. and he knows, he _fucking_ knows, how much better near is than him. near was the soft, calm breeze of a beautiful day; mello was the thunderous rain that threatened to pour. near knew that too, of course he did. that snotty brat would look down on him from his pedestal, blank eyes mocking him.

_ someone ought to put him in his place_.

that fleeting thought is what leads him into making perhaps the worst mistake in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> part 2 in near's pov??


End file.
